Assalam
Alaykum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu :)
May the
peace, mercy and blessings of Allah azza wa jal be upon you!
Before
I begin let us consider some of Allah’s gifts… Take a moment and list at least
5 things that you are grateful for… (be sure to answer this)
... ... ... ... ... Done?
I’m
sure your family and your best friend must have made into the list right? ;)
Now let
me ask you to imagine this. You have a friend and they consider you very close.
They come to you for help, when they’re depressed and when they need a support.
You being a good friend, lend a shoulder to them and always have their back.
But one day, when you were the one who was in need of a listener to your
problems and approached them for help, they turn their face away. Not only
that, they snap at you and say they’ve got more important ‘stuff’ to do.
Tragic, isn’t it? Needless to say, wouldn’t you feel worse? Your friend, whom
you helped selflessly treated you like you never mattered to them… Did you
deserve that treatment when you looked after your friend as your very own
family?
Family
reminds me… Has it ever happened to you that your mom has asked you something
regarding her phone and your only reply was “Not now mom! I’m busy”. And what
are you doing? Downloading some Islamic videos? Even downloading Islamic videos
doesn’t give you a reason to avoid your mom. Or maybe she asked you to get a
glass of water and you did run to the kitchen but with a beautiful grumpy look.
When you were sick (I’m not even going to your infant stage), and asked your
mom for a glass of water like ten times a day, has she e-v-e-r avoided
you? When she was in the kitchen, cooking a meal for you in the heat and you
like a 3 year old ask your mom “Mom can I pleaseeeeeee go out with my friends
to the mall? I need to shop with them. I know you’re toooooo gooood to say no.
Pleaseeeee mom?” She knows you’re just being nice to her so that she gives you
permission and yet she allows you. But the very same day if she asks you to
apply balm on her shoulders, you’re still busy. Why? Cause she’s toooo goooood
to force you to do something you don’t want to.
This
has been going on since the past 2 decades, give or take a few more years.
Our
parents were able to understand our needs and wants since the time we couldn’t
even utter a letter let alone a word. Neither did they complain nor do they
show pretty faces that we do when they ask us to do something for them. I know
they yell and get angry. But it isn’t because they like doing it, it’s because
we force them to. And after they yell, they feel even more horrible than we do.
Don’t we get angry? Then why is it so abnormal for us when they lose their
temper. They aren’t superficial beings of course. When they’ve worked hard and
are still working to bring you up in the lifestyle you prefer, fulfill not only
your needs but even the useless wants, kill their desires so that they can give
you the best, do they deserve to be treated the way we do? Don’t you think they
at least deserve more respect and care?
What
they deserve has been mentioned by Allah (swt) Himself in Surah Israa, verse
23:
وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ
أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا ۚ إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِنْدَكَ
الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُلْ لَهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا
تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُلْ لَهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا
“And
your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good
treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to
them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a
noble word.”
And
verse 24:
وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ
الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُلْ رَبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا
“And lower to them the wing of humility out of
mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when
I was] small.”
See the word highlighted? احسان or Ehsaan.
What is the big deal in this word that it’s required to be highlighted?
Ehsaan means treating our parents with respect,
kindness and honour.
Imagine, Allah (swt), The Creator of everything
in the heavens and in the earth, The Master, The Most Powerful, revealed a
verse nearly 1400 years ago commanding you to honour your parents and treat
them with kindness. We’re so used to not obeying the commands of Allah (swt)
that we let this slip by so easily.
What happens when you obey Allah azza wa jal?
1. “Obey Allah and the Messenger and perhaps you
will be shown mercy.” (3:132)
2. “If you obey him, you will be guided…”
(24:54)
3. “Whoever obeys Allah and the Messenger is with
those whom Allah has blessed.” (4:68)
What happens when we disobey Allah azza wa jal?
“Say, ‘Obey Allah and the Messenger.’ Then if
they turn away, Allah does not love the disbelievers.”
(3:32)
We’re given the title of disbelievers. Is that
what you want for yourself? The choice is yours to make.
By treating your parents with ehsaan, you’re not
only pleasing your parents but you’re paving your way to Jannah, In sha Allah
because you’re also obeying Allah (swt).
“Paradise lies at the feet of your mother” and “Pleasure
of the Lord is in the pleasure of the father and Displeasure of the Lord is in
the displeasure of the father” (Tirmidhi)
Our tongue is so used to uttering these hadiths
and our ears are so used to listening to these hadiths that our hearts has lost
the power to feel its depth.
May Allah (swt) give us the ability to be of
service to our parents and make us sadaqa jaariya for them. May He (swt)
help us obey Him and our parents and may He unite us with our family in Jannah.
Ameen.
Assalam Alaykum.
