You Are Not Alone...

Assalam Alaykum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu!

May the peace, mercy and blessings of Allah (swt) be upon all of you!

Has it ever been that sometimes you have an uproar of emotions and you find it hard to express yourselves? Have you ever felt so depressed about your life that you think it’s better for you to stay isolated? During such times you may feel that no amount of prayers or patience can calm you down or help you overcome your depression… You just lose all hopes that your life is going to be any better and you sulk in grief. You feel the whole world is having a whale of a time and here you are crying your eyes out. 

These emotions have persuaded me to write this article so that anybody going through this period don’t feel they’re alone and are the only ones in the world drowned in agony. If you’re going through any of these emotions then consider this as an amazing opportunity given to you by Allah (swt) Himself to make your life more meaningful and worth living… ;)

I cannot think of anything but this beautiful verse from Surah Baqarah to start with…

يأيُّهَا الَّذينَ ءَامنُواْ استَعِينُواْ بِالصَّبرِ و الصَّلوةِ ^ج  إنَّ اللهَ مَعَ اصّٰبِرين

“O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.” (Verse 153)

وَلَنَبلُوَنَّكُم بِشَىءٍ مِّنَ ﭐلخَوفِ وَ ﭐلجُوعِ وَ نَقصٍ مِّنَ ﭐلأَموٰالِ وَﭐلأنفُسِ وَ ﭐلثَمَرٰتِ وَ بَشِّرِ 

ﭐلصّٰبِرين

“And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient.” (Verse 155)

ﭐلَّذينَ إِذَآ أَصٰبَتهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالواْ إِنَّا للّٰه وَ إِنَّآ إلَيهِ رٰجِعُون

“Who, when disaster strikes them, say, “Indeed we belong to Allah and indeed to Him we will return.” (Verse 156)

أُولْٰئِكَ عَلَيهِم صَلَوٰتٌ مِّن رَّبِّهِم وَ رَحمَةٌ وَ أُوْلٰئِكَ هُمُ ﭐلمُهتَدُون

“Those are the ones upon whom are blessings from their Lord and mercy. And it is those who are the (rightly) guided.” (Verse 157)

For those of us who’re depressed and in a state where we feel nothing in this world can comfort us, we need to take a step back and reflect on these beautiful verses from the Quran. But before I do that, let’s reflect on the wisdom of Allah azza wa jal…

Now whenever we feel sad or are lost into a gloomy world, we tend to ask ourselves certain questions like “Why me?” “What did I do wrong?” “Is this a punishment?” “Didn’t Allah say He wouldn’t burden anybody more than what they can bear? Then why is He causing this pain to me?”

Exactly my point dear brothers and sisters. When Allah (swt) Himself stated in the 

Quran in Surah Baqarah, verse 286

“لا يُكَلِّفُ الله نَفساً إلاّ وُسعَهَا”

“Allah does not burden a soul beyond that which it can bear”

then how can He cause you pain that you cannot tolerate? Na’uzubillah are we trying to say that Allah’s claim is wrong?

How can we forget the Hadith that says, “The greatest reward comes with the greatest trial. When Allaah loves a person, He tests them. Whoever accepts that wins His pleasure but whoever is discontent with that earns His wrath.” (Tirmidhi and Ibn Maajah)

And another Hadith narrated by Umar bin Khattab (رضى الله عنه): “Some prisoners were brought to Rasulullah (صلى الله عليه و سلم), and there was a woman among the prisoners who was searching (for her child). When she found her child, she embraced him and put him to her breast. Rasulullah (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said to us, ‘Do you think that this woman would throw her child in the fire?’ We said, ‘No, by Allah, not if she is able not to.’ He (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said, ‘Allah is more merciful to His slaves than this woman is to her child.’”  (Agreed upon)

How on earth can we doubt the Mercy of Allah (swt) and His wisdom when we’re going a tough period? Don’t you think if you’re facing pain then there must be a reason behind it? And most possibly the reason might be to bring us closer to Allah (swt)? Cause you feel you cannot share your feelings with anybody, the thought of it makes you cry your eyes out and you wouldn’t want anybody to feel you’re weak and to judge you so now who better than Allah (swt) to turn towards to…? He who doesn’t judge anybody who express their weakness before Him. He who is always ready to aid you. He who loves you more than a mother could love her child. He who’s mercy surpasses everything in this world.

One of my articles “Why Me?” deals with similar feelings but this article will focus more on those facing depression and feel they might never be able to come out of it.

Now moving on to the verses from Surah Baqarah that I had mentioned earlier…

What I feel is these 4 verses answers all the questions that anybody going through depression will have. Why am I facing this? How do I deal with this and what will I get out of this? Now let’s see what Allah (swt) wants you to know through these verses…

The first question is, “why am I facing this?”

Let’s see verse 155.

“And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient.”

Allah (swt) tells us that we must be tested with trials to differentiate between those who are truthful and those who are liars, between those who are patient and those who are impatient (Surah Ankabut, verse 2). This is Allah’s wisdom. This is the lesson and benefit of trials. So these difficult times are not for you to go away from Allah azza wa jal and live your life in seclusion. It is these times that give us the opportunity to strengthen our imaan and to prove our loyalty towards Allah (swt).

These trials divide people into 2 categories – the impatient and the patient.

The impatient has to deal with losses in this world and the Hereafter. They will lose the reward attained for obeying Allah (swt) by being patient. This person’s Imaan decreases. They miss out the opportunity of having patience, gratitude, and being satisfied and pleased with the decree of Allah. Rather they become displeased and angry. This attitude shows their immaturity.

As for the one who Allah guides to patience during times of calamity, they restrain their speech and actions of dissatisfaction that leads to the displeasure of Allah. They understand that the reward for being patient is greater than the trials they’re going through. In this sense, the calamity actually becomes a blessing for that person because it becomes a means to achieve something that is better and more beneficial than which was lost.

It is up to us to decide which category of people we want to fall into. Do we want to turn a calamity into a blessing or into a pitfall?

Moving on to the second question, “how do I deal with this?”

They respond to these calamities by saying,

“إِنَّا للّٰه وَ إِنَّآ إلَيهِ رٰجِعُون”

(Indeed we belong to Allah and indeed our return is to Him)

This means we are owned by Allah, and we are under His command and control. So when we are tested with calamities, we must realize it is the Most Merciful running His sovereignty. It is very important to realize that the calamities that befall us are from The All-Wise, The One who has more compassion for His slaves than they even have for themselves. This realization will make us satisfied with Allah (swt) and our hearts will soften out of the love Allah (swt) has for us because we know it is good for us even if we do not understand why. While we are owned by Allah, we will also return to Him on the Judgement Day. Then everyone will be dealt according to their deeds performed in this world. So if we bear patience and seek Allah’s mercy, we will find our great reward with Him. But if we are impatient, dissatisfied, and displeased with His decree, the only thing we will get is dissatisfaction and the missed-out opportunity of the reward of patience.

If you are patient, Allah (swt) is with you. You are under His protection. No harm can get to you when The Owner of this world and the Hereafter is by your side. Your every prayer and every tear is heard and seen by Him. All your actions are watched by Him. He (swt) will never leave you alone even for a blink of an eye. All you need to do is follow His advice and trust Him. And wait for things to take a turn that will make your life much more beautiful and meaningful than it was before.  

Coming to the third question, “what will I get out of this?”

What you will earn is much greater than everything you’re going through. Following what Allah (swt) has advised us to do in times of difficulty is definitely not easy. This is a task that cannot be performed by everyone. And that is the entire purpose of Him testing you! If He, The Wise, The All Knowing, your Creator is asking you to trust Him at times when you see no light, no direction then there must be a great treasure awaiting you at the end of this trial. He is making you go through this struggle because He knows you’re capable to overcoming this in ways nobody else can. You have the power to beat the odds and earn a better life for yourself. Allah (swt) wants you to come of out this trial much stronger and more wiser than you already were. That’s why He is making you go through what I would call – a training process.

This reminds me of a great saying of Ibn ul Qayyim (رحمه الله),

“From the perfection of Allah’s ihsan is that He allows His slave to taste the bitterness of break before the sweetness of the mend. So He does not break His believing slave except to mend him. And He does not withhold from him except to give him. And He does not test him (with hardship) except to cure him.”

When you’re cracking with pain, don’t build a graveyard in your heart. Go to the sink and make wudu. Let the water run through every crack, let it cleanse you. Pull out your rug and turn towards the Kabah. Let every ‘Allahu Akbar’ echo in your heart, reminding you that your pain will be taken care of. Pour out your heavy heart in front of Him when your forehead is on the ground. Cry your heart out when you raise your hands in dua. Ask Allah (swt) for His Help. Ask Him to comfort you. Ask Him to grant you patience to deal with your struggles. Allah (swt) will never let you go empty handed.  

One of the most beautiful things in life is when you sit down and make genuine dua to Allah (swt). Your heart will feel at ease as your worries melt away and Allah’s words become apparent, “Whoever puts his trust in Allah, He will be enough for him.” (65:3)

Ask yourselves. When was the last time you woke up in the middle of the night or the last third of the night to pray to Allah (swt)? When was the last time you tried to work on your relationship with Allah azza wa jal? You know what my dear brothers and sisters? This is your perfect ooportunity to strengthen your connection with Allah (swt). Wake up just 10 minutes before Fajr. We know that the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) told us that it is the last third of the night when Allah azza wa jal descends to the lowest part of the Heavens and He asks “Which one of My servants is seeking My forgiveness so that I may forgive him? Which one of My servants is seeking My mercy so that I may be merciful to them? Which one of My servants is asking of me that I may give to them?” Start your day with it and experience this amazing spiritual feeling and a blessing that Allah (swt) has given us.

I would end my article with one of the most powerful and beautiful verse of the Quran,

ألأ بِذِكرِ ﭐلله تَطمَئِنُّ ﭐلقُلُوب

“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.”

-    Surah Ra’d, verse 28

Assalam Alaykum.